WANT vs. NEED

I wanted you
And that future we talked about.
I wanted to grow with you
And learn about life with you.
I wanted to learn about every one of your flaws 
Just so I could show you I’d love you in spite of them. 
I wanted to open myself up to you,
Tell you things I was scared to tell you,
Leaving me so vulnerable.
But that vulnerability just made me fall more in love with you,
Because it didn’t scare you away in the process.
I wanted you to want me as deeply as I wanted you.
I wanted everything you said to me about how you felt about me to be true.
Maybe that was all too much to ask for 
From a boy that was so unsure of himself.
Maybe I’ll never know why you left,
Why you didn’t fight for someone you saw a future with.
You told me you hoped it didn’t scare me how much you liked me,
You told me you were falling for me too,
You reassured me and made me feel safe.
I wasn’t prepared for this.
That future was ripped away from me.
I’m healing by myself,
Learning and growing by myself,
Trying to love myself in spite of my own flaws,
And coping with intense anxiety.
I wanted you.
But maybe this is what I needed.